This Christmas season I received many great gifts, a couple flannel shirts from Antoine, a grill from my sister and her husband, a really nice spice rack from my parents, etc, but most people didn't really care about these gifts. No, the question on everyone's tongue was whether Antoine put a ring on my finger for Christmas. It's been the question on everyone's mind since we moved in together, they ask "When? Is he going to ask you soon?". Like it's assumed that since we're living together and sharing a house that a wedding needs to follow. Although, it might be a question of decency and innocence that is under attack? You know, that whole "why buy the milk when you can get it for free business". Or, the third reason (the one I tend to prefer) could be that the askers (namely my mom, my grandma, and older female friends) see Antoine and I as a great pair. They can tell that we obviously are crazy about one another so why wouldn't a little diamond ring be the next step? I'll stick with that last reason, and maybe add in a little bit of the first (because I kind of thought that way before I met Antoine).
The answer to everyone's question this holiday season: no, no Antoine did not get down on one knee. And surprisingly I'm not bummed out about it. Don't get me wrong, I'd LOVE it if he did, but I'm happy with where we are right now. I didn't expect to be here, owning a house with my boyfriend of not even two years, but I wouldn't change a thing (okay, maybe I wouldn't have two jobs, but other than that...). The truth is, I know it's coming, I just don't know when. I know Antoine loves me more than anything and we've talked about the future until we've gone blue in the face. And I'm happy to serenely wait for that perfect moment, because until then I'm still an extremely lucky person to have so much love in my life.
On the topic of marriage, I was reading another blog today, one of a local single woman (one of her posts spurred this post). In one of her older quest-for-love-posts she wrote something to the affect that every woman wants to get married and have babies and the dream of that is always on our minds. While I love her blog and agree with most of the things she says, I have to disagree with this particular statement. I think while it's assumed that all little girls grow up daydreaming about their wedding and about the perfect little family they are going to create, it's not always the case. I will admit that, while for most of my life I've prided myself on being a self-proclaimed non-girly girl, I was on of those little girls. Except I only ever thought of the wedding and the man, not the family. Since I was younger I've always been anti-kids, for me not for other people. Children just never made sense to me, maybe because I was a terror when I was little, maybe because I've always been more comfortable around people who were older than me, who knows? So, error number one: not all girls/women want babies. And while I myself am guilty of being one of those girls who dreamed about their wedding dress and their future as a "Sadie" (Sadie, Sadie married lady...come on people, watch some Funny Girl!), I know for a fact that not everyone wants that life. I know a number of women who want love, but not necessarily marriage. And from my personal opinion, I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I can especially understand that now from where I'm currently am in my life, happy as an unwed woman sharing a home and life with the man I love. I'm happy where life has brought me and if I hadn't been one of those little girls who dreamed about my wedding and about being someone's wife I could definitely see everything staying the same as it is right now. But alas, I'll concede and admit that I'm a girly girl and that I'm happily waiting for the day when Antoine puts a ring on it!