Friday, January 21, 2011

The "C" Word


To most it's not a dirty word, but for the past year I've viewed it as one. With the sad state of his job, the lack of promotion when it has been long overdue, and his own unrest, I've known that consulting was becoming, day by day, Antoine's solution to all these problems. And the right solution too! See, with consulting (in his line of work and in most others) you have an opportunity to learn more and move up the chain of command much more quickly. It's basically a fast track to a management position. Plus, the pay is better. I've known that Antoine was interested in consulting since our first few dates, but I'd hid it in the back of mind, far away from all those happy, sunny, easy days, weeks, and months we spent together. While it seemed like the epitome of possibility to him, to me it seemed like torture, something to keep us apart for days at a time. But over the last year, as consulting became more and more a real possibility I (partly out of necessity) began finding it less and less distasteful.

Last Friday, Antoine was offered and accepted a consulting job through his company. He'll start off as an Analyst and within 18 months of consulting become a Consultant. It is a fantastic opportunity for him, and for me. It will mean a pay increase, which will supplement both of our part times jobs exactly. Instead of working part time at Sbux I will have all my evenings and weekends FREE! While Antoine is away Monday through Thursday, I will have TIME to make my lunch in the evening (for the next day), clean the bathroom and have quality bonding time with the animals. And when Antoine comes home on the weekend, we will have two solid days (without any interruption...aka part time job) together. During the week we will call each other and email each other and we will miss each other. But the week's time spent apart will make the weekends more meaningful! I know it will not be easy, but I do not doubt our ability to adapt and make this work. We are strong people and our love for one another is even stronger!

But now, as I stand on the brink of what might be a big change in our day-to-day life I can't help but be both happy and terrified. I am endlessly excited for Antoine! When he called to tell me of the news I could hear the restrained excitement in his voice. There is so much hope and joy in his smile and it is brought about by the possibilities this change holds. But, as I sit next to Antoine taking in all this excitement I can't help but be a little afraid. Ever since Antoine and I started dating almost 3 years ago we've been attached at the hip. We travel together, see movies together, go grocery shopping together, cook together...we're basically one of those couples you want punch in the face. The couple that is apart for a day and a half (example: my recent trip to Indy) and cannot stop texting each other and telling one another how much they miss them and how they can't wait to see them and they love them! Please, try not to punch either one of us in the face right now...thanks! And I rely on him so much in our day-to-day life, he packs my lunch in the morning and let's the dog out when I'm in the shower or getting ready for work. He's there for me when I need him the most...when I've had a bad day or I'm not feeling well he cheers me up or brings me some ice cream. And, even though I know he'll be there for me no matter how far away he is, the idea of an empty house...without him in it...makes me sad.

I am sure these feelings will get worse before they get better, but I do know that they will get better! Sure, it's going to be tough but we'll figure it out. And in the long run, this will be good for our future, it will mean more security. It will give us the opportunity to travel to all those places we want to go someday. It will allow us both to just have ONE job! Not two [each]!!! This will be good, I know it will! But, please think good thoughts and send all your good vibes our way as we transition into something so wildly new and slightly scary!


Christian said...

This will, initially, be a trying time for you both while you work to adjust to the changes you described. But, you guys have something really good and will find that a level of independence isn't as scary or bad as you'd think. It's just another phase of your relationship just like meeting, dating, moving in, etc.

wonderousclusterf#@k said...

Thanks C!

Anonymous said...

You can do it! :) Not having 2 jobs and having uninterrupted time together on the weekends, that will be so wonderful! Plus nice company for you during the week from all the animal companions, you won't be alone with dear Cheese & kitties there for you! Congratulations to Antoine and best wishes to you both! And if Antoine has a laptop with him and you set up Skype you can see & talk to each other in the evenings for a nice chat.